Dear 2015

Dear 2015,

Another one done, crossed off, completed.
My how fast you flew by, allowing little time to breathe and relax and what feels like no opportunity to find peace.
You were always going to present challenges and obstacles, I was expecting that and I suppose, looking back as the final curtain draws, you were good.
Things I expected to push me to the very edge were actually where I found most happiness and friendship-I can do it again, you remind me.
The New year  invited a gold tinted memory, a morning sunset at the beach and, ridiculously and ashamedly, the beginning of revision. Dark nights growing shorter with the promise of summer, days spent in pyjamas working away. You brought my favourite book in the month of February which I ran home to read, my first gig and a night trip to Edinburgh. One of my favourite days spent with Alice doing our usual cafĂ© crawl goes down in fond memory.
Spring is always the perfect season, bright crisp mornings, hopes that better things are on their way and March continued much like the others. Along with many other months, I spent it in failed attempts to run and get outside, choosing to spend my hours blogging and writing. I began my first attempt at a longer story which, almost a year on, is still ticking on. (Future self: Look at "Pick a country"-I hope you've thought of a name).
I look back over the months of March and April with happiness, although they were tainted with the stress and panic that appears to have ___ this whole year, I felt stable and as though there were some vague ideas of what I was doing. A repeated highlight was of course the annual trip to Southwold, a place where I feel at home and yearn to spend everyday. I remember you brought some good reads that I look back on, desperate to find something similar.  A new experience of Go-Karting which, after a panic about the helmet, was exceptionally fun and I hope to repeat.
May, you brought the realisation that what I knew was coming to the end, that I was growing up and things were "getting serious". Although you saw the beginning of exams, remember, I did rather enjoy these weeks. Everyone working together, a sense of support, and, although the tears exams brought, part of me rather enjoyed them (yes). I poured every last ounce into my textiles coursework which, thank goodness, I came out with full marks in.
June began with the worst exams of all but you epitomised at the height of adolescent summer. Nights spent with the warmth of both summer and alcohol running through our veins, dancing so hard because really, we had nothing to loose. The last day of school as we knew it, a lunchtime doing what felt like family portraits that I look back at with eternal love, and of course Prom, which I go into more detail about here. One of those memories, so simple but so happy, is lying in a best friends conservatory, laughing and talking until we saw the rise of the next days sun, thinking what is the point of sleeping.
I got dragged away into the bliss of summer and my days dwindled away, spent watching Wimbledon, colouring, evenings in the park, adventures, exploring abandoned buildings, laughs, parties, BBQ's. A picnic with Alice which, once again if you are reading this, makes me jolly happy to look back on.
You, 2015, did however bring a feeling of pressure. "I should be having fun, shouldn't be spending precious moments alone not really doing much". You didnt allow me to enjoy it as I thought I should, I was expected to spend 12 weeks partying and laughing and not spend one second alone. I suppose this is the cause of my lack of peace. I did make new friends, adding to our growing group and sensed a drift in our tight 4 piece pact.
There were some amazing moments however, a trip camping with my best friends, Edinburgh festival, evenings at the beach, a holiday in Scotland, an attempt up Ben Nevis, a visit from Maddie, adventures in London but I felt so much expectation. Summer closed with a group trip to Durham and then the funniest evening at various parties.
And since then life has been much the same, a repeat of work, expectation, failure and this bloody pressure I cannot relieve. I have submersed myself fully in A-levels, working too hard and constricting myself too much. I did thoroughly enjoy watching the Rugby World Cup which has to be one of my guilty pleasures. I even managed to begin running before school-finally. Alas, the chill of Autumn did bring new adventures, my first flight alone (well, without a parent) which has to be my greatest achievement of the year along with a truly harrowing trip, a bedroom revamp to kickstart my motivation, a visit to Brighton and a slow slide into Christmas...and many other memories that drift away into a haze of contentment.
2015, you close with a sense of slight unease-a repeat of the pressures of summer, fears of friendships and exams and surpassing expectations.
But you have been good.
I have adventured and laughed and partied and cried and stressed and loved but it will go down in memory.
Thank you 2015, its been a roller coaster but we are rolling into the 16th with anticipation.
Please be good.

Currently: Listening:--//Reading:The Reluctant Fundamentalist//Loving: Being off school//Lusting: Dungarees

***apologies if this post is kinda moany and annoying-its for my personal reflection on one of my solemn evenings when I get real nostalgic lol

A tour of my bookshelves

Books are wonderfully aesthetic and completely personal. Everyone has a different collection of different editions, all with different stories of their ownership and a different treatment. Some fold the pages,break the spine, annotate the pages (that's me) while others keep them beautifully pristine.
Stories with in stories.
I feel I will be adding to this collection, probably for the rest of my life. I will link each book to their page on Goodreads, where you can read a description and ratings etc and for any that I already have a review, I shall of course link it.
So let's begin.
Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows-J.K Rowling
Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire-J.K Rowling
Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince-JK.Rowling
Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix-J.K Rowling
Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban-J.K Rowling
Harry Potter and the Philosophers Stone-J.K Rowling (sorry they aren't in order and one's missing)
The Last Fighting Tommy-Harry Patch
The Book Thief-Markus Zusak--review
My Sister Lives on the Mantle Piece-Annabel Pitcher
Ketchup Clouds-Annabel Pitcher--review
Will Grayson, Will Grayson-John Green
The Fault In Our Stars-John Green--review
Looking For Alaska-John Green
PaperTowns-John Green
Shock of the Fall-Nathan Filer
The Perks of Being a Wallflower-Stephen Chbosky--review
The Silverlinings Play Book-Matthew Quick--review
Wonder-Raquel. J. Palacio
Eleanor and Park-Rainbow Rowell
Fangirl-Rainbow Rowell
All the Bright Places-Jennifer Niven--review
I'll Give You the Sun-Jandy Nelson--review
Me and Earl and the Dying Girl-Jesse Andrews
The lovely Bones-Alice Sebold--review
Savvy-Ingrid Law
The Help-Kathryn Stockett--review
No and Me-Delphine de Vigan
The Garbage King-Elizabeth Laird
Uglies-Scott Westerfield 
When Hitler Stole Pink Rabbit-Judith Kerr
Bombs on Aunt Dainty-Judith Kerr
A Streetcat Named Bob-James Bowden
Artichoke Hearts-Sita Bramachari
The Ant Colony-Jenny Valentine
Counting in 7's-Holly Goldberg Sloan
Hunger Games-Suzanne Collins 
Hunger Games, Catching Fire-Suzanne Collins
Hunger Games,Mocking Jay-Suzanne Collins
The Maze Runner-James Dashner
Divergent-Veronica Roth
The Little Stranger-Sarah Waters
The Great Gatsby-F. Scott Fitzgerald
Gorsky- Vesna Goldsworthy
To Kill A Mockingbird-Harper Lee--review
1984-George Orwell--review
Animal Farm-George Orwell
Of Mice and Men-John Steinbeck
The Crucible-Arthur Miller
A Streetcar Named Desire
The Picture of Dorian Gray-Oscar Wilde
Go Set a Watchman-Harper Lee---review
A guide to Paris-DK
Chill-Deborah Reber
First World War Poems
The Book Thief-Markus Zusak (I have two copies)
What I was-Meg Rosoff (this is, hands down, the weirdest book I have ever read)
One Day-David Nicholls
All the Truth Thats in Me-Julie Berry
Once-Morris Gleitzman
The Lord of the Flies-William Golding
The Adventures of Sherlock Holmes-Arthur Conan Doyle
Room-Emma Donoghue
The Boy in the Striped Pyjamas-John Boyne
Black Swan Green-David Mitchell
Restless-William Boyd--review
Elsewhere-Gabrielle Zevin--review
We Were Liars- E. Lockhart--review
Brave New World-Aldous Huxley
Heaven on Earth-101 Happy Poems-Wendy Cope
Rogets Thesaurus
Children's Miscellany
Birdsong-Sebastian Faulks
The Knife of Never Letting Go-Patrick Ness
The Storied Life of A.J Fikry-Gabrielle Zevin
The Uncommon Reader-Alan Bennet
Banksy New York
Deliciously Ella-Ella Woodward
A Century In Photographs-The Times
Secret Garden Colouring Book-Johanna Basford
Make-Cath Kidston
Kirstie's Vintage Home-Kirstie Allsopp
Homemade-Ros Badger and Elspeth Thompson
Simple and Delicious Cupcakes
642 Things to Write About-San Francisco Writers Grotto---review
Listography-All I Hope to Do in Lists-Lisa Nola
Collins French Dictionary and Grammar
The Pocket Scavenger-Keri Smith
Cancer-Your Personal Horoscope 2015

What is your favourite book? Any I need to add to my collection?
Katie x

Currently: Listening: Spotify Christmas playlists//Reading: Counting in 7's--Charlottee Bronte-Jane Eyre//Loving: sleeping//Lusting: sleep