just some thoughts and words

These past few weeks have been a lot, and I mean a lot. I won't bore you but I have had more visitors, done more work, slept less and stopped less than I ever thought possible. Its been good and bad, but mostly good. There's been a lot of difficult but necessary introspection, quite a few nights at the pub, a lot of friends, some tears and some kind of hard conversations. 

Here are some highlights, or just some happenings. And some sun. 

Today was sunny, and it felt like spring. I think its helping to lift my blue mood. I played netball, laughed a lot and took a day off.

Here are some things that have been helping me, through days that can feel challenging and moments that feel overwhelmingly anxious. 

Buying daffodils, for my windowsill.

Talking to people about it.

Being hugged.

Listening to rain sounds as I fall asleep.

Lavender pillow spray.

Taking a day off. 

Cafes to work, because sometimes libraries are too much. 

This working playlist, and this one. 

Taking photos to fill up my empty camera roll.

A post-crying hot shower. 

Remembering it hasn't always been like this. 

Plans, and coffees, and seeing different friends. 

Giving myself some leeway with my work; handing in an essay late, only doing half a reading list, understanding that 3 essays a week is unachievable.

Its not that these things have cured me, or stopped the incessant butterflies in my stomach or the feeling of loneliness, despite being surrounded by friends, but it has eased it a little.

Tonight we're having a dinner party, and tomorrow the grind starts again. 

Peace nd love to u all, stay strong.